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Unread July 21st, 2005, 01:56 AM   #1
12amb0
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I have been dating my girlfriend for a while, but whenever I compliment on how beautiful she is & how she lights up my day, she hardly is even moved by it. She has said it is because "everybody" tells her that & it doesn't mean much. I would like to tell her how gorgeous she is in a romantic...different way. If any of you have suggestions, it would be geatly appreciated! Thanks!
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Unread July 21st, 2005, 02:08 AM   #2
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Hmm.. I had this 'problem' too. I've have lots of people tell me that i'm pretty, but it meant something a little more when my boyfriend said it.

One occasion that sticks out in my mind is one evening we were at the park sitting on the bleachers and he was just staring at me. I smiled and he seemed totally taken back and just said something along the lines of "Sometimes you're just beyond gorgeous. I don't understand it."

It was a nice moment
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Unread July 21st, 2005, 02:09 AM   #3
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You cant.... She's being a bitch. She's put you in a situation that cant be solved. Its like her asking that impossible question "Do you like the red dress or the green?"

Stop saying it and she'll beg for you to say it... Or claim you dont love her anymore.
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Unread July 21st, 2005, 02:13 AM   #4
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No...she's not being a bitch... Maybe I didn't explain it well enough. She doesn't "feel" as special when anyone tells her that because I think it was overused... but thanks for the input! I'm thinking of reading a poem that tells her how I feel...that way it would be special, and no one else has done it for her. This was the one I was thinking of:

Beauty Unseen
by Michael Anderson
How can I show you you're beautiful?
Can this question be answered?
How can I show you you're beautiful,
When all I can offer you is word?

Can I tell you that your eyes shine-
As the warmth of a Winter fire?
Your lips, soft petals of a rose,
All painted with desire?

Shimmering tresses of your hair,
The touch of silk freshly spun.
Your tears, like wet dew dripping-
In the heat of morning's sun.

Your skin, sultry like satin,
Your smile, a breeze in Spring.
Watching you walk across the room,
Like listening to angels sing.

How can I show you you're beautiful?
How can I paint a picture in your mind?
How can I show you what you are to me,
Knowing that you are blind?

What do you think?
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Unread July 21st, 2005, 02:35 AM   #5
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if you wrote that poem yourself then maybe.

otherwise i wouldnt read that to her. my gf would probably laugh! (probably not but u get my drift)
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Unread July 21st, 2005, 02:38 AM   #6
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lol Yeah, I catch your drift...I guess I could write her a song since I am a musician...but thanks!
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Unread July 21st, 2005, 02:42 AM   #7
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Yeah these days the romantic poet is just laughed at most of the time.

I dont mean she's a bitch, she is just being one on this particular subject. Using the excuse that "I think it was overused" is a cop-out. Its not overused, she just can't accept it for the generous and truthful statement that you mean it to be. She's testing you to see how far you are willing to go to prove how beautiful you think she is.

If it comes from the heart it shouldn't matter what the word is.

Mick
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Unread July 21st, 2005, 10:55 AM   #8
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The romantic poet was always laughed at. It's usually a laugh of over enjoyment though. Think about it, it's kind of a silly thing to do saying a poem to someone. IT's not that they don't appreciate it, as much as they are just laughing at the moment when people get too serious about it.

I find that if you're going to use already written poem you have to collect a few of them. I've done it a couple times and each time it was well recieved. But basically over the course of a day I left about five poems for the girl in places that they go to every day. But you have to be good about the placement otherwise one is lost in the wind.

Something like one in her sock or underwear drawer (she opens that everyday hopefully). Another in the fridge, or on the car. One in her backpack, suitcase, etc. And another couple in other places that she'll commonly open during the course of the day.

This kind of thing shows a lot of effort, and dancing around in order to not get spotted planting them. It's just something I've done.

But yeah, saying You're beautiful is being overused. Often actual pretty girls have heard that from everyone. She just wants you to say it in a different way. Keep in mind depending on her age, she could have heard that from any moron. You have no idea how many drunk guys stare at a girl and just go "Hey, you're Beautiful!" So as you can imagine it could carry a negative relationship with it.
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Unread July 21st, 2005, 03:00 PM   #9
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Maybe some inapprieciative girls would laugh. I, on the other hand, would swoon over such a beautiful poem.

Mick has a good point. As long as she feels that you're being genuine then she should learn how to take the compliment. And, like already said, it could be her own way of telling you to show her your love.

Words are wonderful. Though I can't always be articulate about love, because its so elusive and magical and undescribable that you're left speechless. Actions often speak louder then words.
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Unread July 21st, 2005, 03:17 PM   #10
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Since I've started playing music, I've found no stronger aphrodisiac (sp) than a gentle strumming with a few choice words being sung over it. It's better than GHB...not that I would know.
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Unread July 21st, 2005, 04:43 PM   #11
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Maybe she doesn't want to hear that she's pretty? If she gets it a lot, she may start to feel like she's just eye candy. While most girls would enjoy that for a while, I'm sure it would get old (I wouldn't know....hahah)

Maybe this is her way of saying that she wants to be appreciated for something else? Something not so noticable as physical appearance, so it's sort of proof that you see her as more than that. I'm sure that's how I'd feel if I got compliments on my looks alone from my bf all the time.

The most memorable compliment I've gotten from my guy is "you make the best chocolate milk". Silly, but it's those little things that I think it's cool for him to notice (and I do make the best chocolate milk...you gotta put a little cream in it. But don't tell him my secret. He thinks I'm just magic or something)
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Unread July 22nd, 2005, 12:34 AM   #12
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Or instead of just telling her she's beautiful, make it specific... What exactly is it about her that you love? Her sparkling eyes, her carefree laugh, the way her lips curl when she smiles? Whatever it is, tell her! That shows that you're paying attention to HER, and not just trying to get in her pants or whatever with a false compliment...
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Unread July 22nd, 2005, 01:14 AM   #13
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I told my GF she was beautiful a lot. Once she asked me what exactly it was that made her beautiful. So I listed the things;

It went like this... "I love your hips" - and I placed both hands on her waist. "I love how your waist dives in here", "I love your butt, its such a great shape and so firm", "I love that you wear g-strings to show it off to me"
"I love how your shoulders, waist and butt all work together to give you such a sexy female shape" "I love your boobs, I love how big your nipples are"
"I love your smell" - Grabbing her hair and sniffing it, then sniffing her neck and kissing it.
"I love your eyes, I love how they change colour depending on your mood"
"I love how you WANT to fuck the living daylights out of me"

"I love your shoulders" - Placed my hands on them, then moved them up her neck.. "I love your neck"

Then I started to just say "I love this, and these" while running my hands along her fingers, turning her hand over and touching everything that I find attractive about her "This, and this, and these, and these".

etc, etc

She got the hint. I love her.

Mick
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Unread July 22nd, 2005, 01:38 AM   #14
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Man some of you guys are really creative! I never do anything like leaving notes or poems in places for a girl to find. There is just something in my personality that tells me that doing anything excessive like giving flowers for no reason, writing poems or writing songs for a girl is just over doing it. I feel like by doing this stuff I'd start becoming to overbearing so I in fact don't do anything special really.
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Unread July 22nd, 2005, 03:11 AM   #15
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Ditto.
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Unread July 22nd, 2005, 08:08 AM   #16
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Quote:
Originally posted by Lone_Raider@Jul 22 2005, 05:38 PM
Man some of you guys are really creative! I never do anything like leaving notes or poems in places for a girl to find. There is just something in my personality that tells me that doing anything excessive like giving flowers for no reason, writing poems or writing songs for a girl is just over doing it. I feel like by doing this stuff I'd start becoming to overbearing so I in fact don't do anything special really.
Sometimes the tiniest thing can be something special. Things like flowers just die anyway! (Though they are nice to get I'm sure - not that I would know!). I think when someone does something really unexpected for you it can be just as special as anything else. When my s/o had just got back home (we're in an LDR) I was on the phone to him and in tears, and he told me to look under my tissue box and there was a note there from him. Nothing elaborate and fancy, just saying that he loves me. And that meant a lot to me.

A bit off-topic but anyway. No one except for my current boyfriend has ever called me beautiful so I guess I can't put much input into that department. But he says things like he loves my "button nose".

Whatever is said, it's the most meaningful if it comes from the heart. I think someone else said that, and I agree. If she is finding it repetitive hearing that she's beautiful, hard to say if she fishing for other compliments or if it just plain over-used.

What Rainne said about hearing compliments about other than appearance made me think of this. I used to organise a Valentine's Day thing back in high school where people could send anonymous (or signed) messages to their boy/girlfriends, crushes, or whoever. And one of the more memorable ones went something like this:

"I think you're beautiful. And that means on the outside, too."
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